Spring break was some much-needed time off. Midterms rocked me, and my favorite Lau 2 cubicle was consistently occupied the week leading up to spring break. Whether you stayed on campus, went home, or went to Punta Cana, the past week definitely felt different from the midterm-filled one right before. 

Some people might have never left the Georgetown bubble over break. I bet everyone who stayed on campus had more of a break from Georgetown than those who went to Punta Cana with the rest of the school. Whether you took time off from Georgetown or not, it’s time to get back at it: finish the semester strong, or whatever. 

Tip #1: Overfill Your GCal

We all know and love our GCals. I live by the rule that if it’s not on my GCal, it doesn’t exist. And if it’s not in stop-sign red, it’s clearly not important. 

Are you from Georgetown even if you don’t use your GCal? (Get it? Like the TikTok audio in the heavy NY accent? “Are you from New York even? Do you have a big black puffer jacket even??” No? Just me?? Ok…) 

What’s the point of having a calendar if you don’t flex on everyone behind you in class as you flip tabs and you are just SO busy with everything on your GCal??? I always feel like people judge me if they can see my GCal. Either they think I have too much on my calendar or I don’t have enough. Nah, it’s definitely only the latter. Or they judge what’s on my calendar. Like my most important events on February 1, 2022 being Harry Styles’ birthday and my half birthday in stop-sign red and every other Georgetown student has a meeting for their Hillternship. Annnndddd that leads us to our next tip. 

Tip #2: Apply for Your Summer Internships 

I mean let’s BeReal, you probably should’ve done this months ago if you sincerely care about your future. 

On a completely different note, I just applied for an internship last night. 

I made my parents stay on the phone the whole time and walk me through it because I had no idea what I was doing and didn’t want to mess it up. But this isn’t about me, I’m a mess and I am just here to give advice. Like your friend who has never been in a relationship but gives the best relationship advice? Yeah, that’s me. 

My application wasn’t for the Hill, but if you want to be taken seriously at Georgetown, you need to work on the Hill. You could also consider Deloitte or Goldman Sachs. That’s it. It’s the only way to really take advantage of your Georgetown education. 

Sincerely, a humanities student who has no interest in government or finance. 

Tip #3: Post Those Spring Break Photos, Baby!

I mean, how else would all 2,000 of your closest friends know that you went to Punta Cana if you don’t post it on your Instagram? Also, I actually want to see your pictures, so I can live vicariously through them. It’s only fair. Tag me, bestie!

Naturally, you would want to post at a good time because if you post during spring break when everyone is still doing their own thing, no one will see it. Trust me, I’m speaking from experience. But don’t worry about me! I don’t need validation from social media! Really, I’m fine. 

As I said before, I am that friend who has never been in a relationship. It might not make sense, but I will give you the best advice. You just need to trust me. Trust my words only, not my actions. I know that’s the opposite of what you’ve been told your entire life, but maybe everyone else has just been wrong and I’m finally setting the record straight. 

If I try and fail, why would you want to repeat my actions?? So I’m telling you, post after spring break, and your post will do so much better. Or you can be a wimp like me and just turn off the like count. 

Seriously though, I’m simply here to lead by words, not by example. Please, please do not follow my example. The world does not need two of me. I promise.

Tip #4: Keep the Party Going!!!

Boys and girls… ladies and gentlemen… It’s St. Paddy’s day weekend! What better way to push off your responsibilities and continue the spring break vibe than to party all weekend? I Truly™ don’t know. 

Of course, I will be getting all of my work done prior to the weekend because I am a studious girl who values her education (the rest of this article may lack sincerity, but if my parents are reading this, I promise I’m going to class and doing ALL of my homework XOXO).

Anyone who has ever said that Georgetown doesn’t know how to party clearly has never been to a Georgetown party. What better way to get back into the Georgetown bubble than to party with all of your favorite future politicians?!

I would now like to address all the schools that are on spring break right now who celebrated this venerated holiday last weekend. Personally, I believe that diminishes the integrity of the holiday and tarnishes its reputation. 

I will firmly say that I do not approve of the early celebration of St. Paddy’s Day. To do my very best to correct these wrongs, I will be partying extra hard. I hope to see all of you little leprechauns there! 

Tip #5: Ease Into It 

I am writing this from my favorite Lau 2 cubicle after a long day of Tuesday classes. There truly is not a better way to ease back into classes than to sit in your favorite study spot and procrastinate like your life depends on it. It’s the best feeling in the world. 

One of my professors today decided it would be best to ease back into class, and I was so grateful until I realized I don’t think we have the same definition of easing back into class. 

We watched a documentary on whaling in the 19th century. While I appreciate the effort, I’m not sure how applicable the deep knowledge I now have about whaling in the 1800s is to the rest of my life. 

Some of my friends have professors who canceled class; meanwhile, I have a professor who has us watch whale documentaries. Sounds about right. If anyone wants to learn more about whale hunting (I advise against it, it’s pretty gruesome), I am available to impart my knowledge. I sure have a lot of it now. 

This example was pretty niche (unless other professors also showed whale documentaries), but what I’m trying to say is take it slow, and maybe go watch an obscure documentary because that will definitely slow your day down. It might even put you to sleep. 

Final Thoughts

I have made it abundantly clear, but I would like to reiterate: follow these tips closely. If you know me in real life, first of all, no you don’t. 

Second of all, do NOT follow my example. Ninety-nine percent of the time I feel like my life is test driving a car and it doesn’t really matter what happens to it because it’s not yours. While this life is in fact mine, I really am just a test driver who is seeing what happens. 

Treat these tips like your own personal Bible, or Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide for Georgetown Students. They are basically the same thing. 

Lastly, if you went to Punta Cana and made it this far into this post, I would like to say that I didn’t mean to offend anyone, I mean no disrespect / it’s my right to be hellish / I still get jealous. If you can’t tell, I am currently listening to “Jealous” by Nick Jonas. 

My music was on shuffle, but maybe it’s fate because I am a smidge jealous. Maybe one day I will find my true Georgetown calling by going on the spring break trip and posting on social media with captions that make sense to nobody except the people who were there. 

No matter where you go n spring break, just know that the Hilltop will always welcome you home IF AND ONLY IF you follow these tips. Otherwise, you’re going to be more of a social pariah than if you didn’t go on the crazy spring break trip to a tropical country like the rest of the school. 

Header Image: Architectural Digest